Friday, August 3, 2012


In many aspects of my life, I have a lot of responsibility. At work, I am the only person with my job so a whole department's worth of responsibility falls on me. I have to remember minute details for over 30 programs. At home, I've always been the responsible one too. I manage the finances. I drive us most places. I keep our schedule straight. I take care of Bronx.

But yesterday I messed up.

Yesterday I forgot that since I had a work function, I needed to tell LoLo to pick Bronx up from daycare.

Let me pause a minute so you can get over your disbelief of how horrible a puppy mom I am.

I know. It's crazy. I feel like the worst person right now. I cried as soon as I got home from my work function. This week has been hectic. I have had work functions every night this week, in addition to my regular workday. I have been completely exhausted. 

The daycare called me twice but I was working and didn't hear the phone. They have boarding there so the message they left was that they set him up in a suite with his food and water and a comfy bed and that I could just get him in the morning. I know they will take great care of him, but I feel horrible. 

Some of you may be saying "where was LoLo? Didn't he wonder where Bronx was when he got home?" and I asked those same questions. But when he answered me, something clicked. He thought I must have arranged something for him because I always do. I always do. 

Yesterday I didn't.

At some point my control responsibility has become a crutch for others in my life. People expect that I will remember every detail of every program at work because 9 times out of 10, I do. LoLo expects that I will remember to pay the bills and remember where we are supposed to be and at what time because more often than not, I do. It's gotten to the point that he relies on me for that information. 

I couldn't even blame him for not noticing Bronx wasn't there because normally I would never forget something like that. But it didn't take away my feelings of wanting him to take a little responsibility off my plate. 

I know this morning we will pick Bronx up and he will jump on me and wag his little tail and he'll be fine. I just hope my ego can do the same. 

Thank goodness my puppy is a rock star!


Katie Price said...

Erin, we are so alike. This is the sort of situation that could happen in my house. What a good reminder that it's time to let go of some things and start working as a team. {And by reminder, I mean to me.}

Sandra said...

People rely on me too much too. And I'm so not the person to babysit or coddle people. I just step up and take care of stuff. So when I have the type of day you did, it's like the world is falling apart.

k8te said...

i am a huge control freak, and can totally relate! it's hard to let go of things, but i've recently been letting my husband handle all the bills (gasp!)

don't beat yourself up! just the fact that bronx goes to doggie daycare shows that you are not a horrible puppy mom! :)

Oh hello, Love said...

If you're worried about this happening when you have babies, might I offer a few possible solutions??

1) Hire me as your baby/blog sitter. Neither should never be left unattended.

2) Hire Adrian as your lawn boy. He'll need a job too if I move to take care of your blog/baby.

3) Build us a guest house on your property so I can work long hours when you work long hours.

Problems solved.

Annnnd I'm sure Bronxy is fine. If he's not, throw the cone back on him. I kid. I kid.

Lacey in the City said...

Oh Bronxy! He was totally fine with his Pup Sleepover- remember how we used to love when our parents would let us stay out with our friends?!

I understand your thoughts on wishing LoLo had taken some of the responsibility off of your plate, but I really admire that you acknowledged that because you always are in charge of the situation that you've provided a crutch that made him just not think a second thing about it. My mind probably wouldn't have functioned that way, so I applaud you for thinking of that.