Wednesday, March 27, 2013

My next adventure

Those of you who are my facebook and twitter friends may have seen a status update last Friday from me that was full of excitement. That little update was.......

I'm going to Paris for work in June!!!!!!

I am so excited!!! Each year, my company puts on 15-17 seminars all over the world for faculty members to learn about a part of the world. There are amazing locations, everywhere from Paris to Botswana to Mexico to India to Turkey to Spain and Morocco. And because I often work with faculty in my position, I was chosen to go on one of the seminars.

Because of the timing of the seminars and because of my limitations as a pregnant woman, it was decided I would go to Paris. The program focuses on disability and how French culture sees disabilities. I'm especially excited because one of my co-workers is leading the seminar and is someone I find fascinating. She is passionate about many of the same issues as I am and she and I instantly connected last year when we met.

So that is my exciting news. Baby Santana is making his/her first international trip!

Friday, March 22, 2013

The loneliness of the first trimester

Everyone says that when you find out you're pregnant, you feel so much joy and excitement. People often warn of the morning sickness that comes with the first trimester, but don't warn about how lonely that first trimester can be.

Often during my first trimester, I felt really alone. LoLo couldn't see a physical difference in my body, he only saw that I was really tired (which he at first said I was just being lazy). I wasn't really telling my friends yet, so there was no one to talk to about how I was feeling and what I was going through. I did have my family because we told them as soon as we found out, but I kind of wanted to talk with my friends who had had babies recently. I wanted to talk with someone who'd been through it. Someone who could understand how I was feeling physically and mentally.

There were days when I was so exhausted and just wanted to yell out, "I'm pregnant and I'm going home for a nap!" But I couldn't do that because no one knew yet and I had to try to act normal. I can't even imagine how it would have been if I had had morning sickness.

Pregnancy is such a weird thing to me so far. I'm just now starting to show a little bit (even though I've only gained one pound, my body is definitely shifting) and that has made me feel like it's more real, but I'm still kind of at the point where I don't feel any different than I did before I was pregnant. I've felt the baby move a couple of times which was exciting, but in the times that I don't feel it move, it's almost like it's not there.

People ask how I'm doing and my answer is always that I'm just hanging out...waiting for something to happen. I honestly don't feel different and am just waiting and excited for the time when I will feel like this is more real. Just two and a half more weeks until our big ultrasound where we get to see the baby for a longer time! Maybe that will help...

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

16 weeks

So for someone who said she wasn't ready for children, I'm turning into a total sap. Yesterday we had our third ultrasound and yesterday was the first day I really felt connected to the baby. Probably because the baby really looked like a baby this time. Even more so than at our 12 week ultrasound. We could see the little nose, the little lips. A hand behind its head so that it looked like it was just chilling.

Mother Nature knows what she's doing. I'm so amazed with the human body and all that it can do. My body totally knows what it's supposed to do and what I'm supposed to eat. Throughout this pregnancy so far, I have been craving fruit like nothing else. I've always liked fruit, but now, all I want is pears, apples, oranges, blueberries, mango, pineapple, anything fruit! I've been eating fresh fruit, canned fruit, little fruit cups, and smoothies. Oh and also, so random, but fruity Pop Tarts. Yum.

I have to admit, some might say I'm having the easiest pregnancy ever (knock on wood!). I had no morning sickness whatsoever. My body was tired in the first trimester, but I'm definitely regaining my energy. I have basically been living life like I did before I was pregnant.

After 16 weeks in, I've gained about 1 pound. My weight is definitely shifting (my pants are pretty tight if I don't do the rubber band trick or use my belly band), but I'm not gaining it. I read last night about a woman who gained 80 pounds when she had her children. I'm pretty grateful that that's not me. But at the same time, I'm not trying to not gain weight.

In fact, I feel like this is the first time in my life that seeing the scale go up wouldn't bother me at all. I am eating when I'm hungry, but my body is working hard to grow this little baby!

I felt the baby move for the first time last Tuesday, but I wasn't quite sure that was what I felt. But then, on Saturday, I knew I felt it. There was no question about it.

After the ultrasound today, I couldn't stop looking at the pictures of that little face and smiling. That little face belongs to my little baby that I'm going to meet in August. I seriously can't believe it.

Oh and also, Happy 1st Birthday to my Blog! Last year at this time, I was unemployed and needed a distraction... this year, I have all the distraction I need!

Monday, March 11, 2013

According to LoLo...Sleeping Hats

The other night when we were getting ready for bed, LoLo yelled over to me from the other room "Erin, do you know where they sell sleeping hats?" To which I said, "Ummm what's a sleeping hat?" LoLo explained, "Well, it's a hat kind of like what Santa wears, but you wear it to bed!" I tried so hard to hold in my laughter because instantly this image came to mind:

stock vector : Grumpy Old man in pajamas holding a candle
Does anyone wear these anymore? I mean, besides Scrooge. Why would a guy who produces enough body heat that we can completely turn off the heat at night want a hat to wear in bed? Where would LoLo have seen this?

The next day, I asked him why he asked me about the sleeping hat. He told me that he was worried his head would get cold because he had just cut his hair.

Oh LoLo, you never stop entertaining me. Even when you don't mean to.

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

15 weeks

Yesterday marked 15 weeks of being pregnant. Time seems to be going slowly, but at the same time, going fast. In just 5 weeks, I'll be halfway done!

Over the past few weeks since I started telling people my secret, I've received so much love and happiness from so many people. It's amazing how much this little baby is going to be loved, and is already loved, and how much s/he has reminded me of the overwhelming amount of love I have in my life.

How could you not love that face? (I know it totally looks like a generic baby face, but it's MY baby's generic baby face!!)
 Many people have been asking how I'm feeling. How my first trimester went. Was I sick at all? Are we going to find out if it's a boy or a girl?

The answers to those questions are quite simple actually. I've not been sick at all. I had a couple of headaches along the way, but never sick or nauseous. I was really tired during the first trimester and I'm still a little bit tired, but I'm starting to get back to normal. I keep telling people, if I weren't 100% sure there was a baby in here, I might not believe I was pregnant.

But today, I felt it. At least I think I did. I felt a little flutter and I asked my friend Hanna who just had her baby what it felt like when she first felt the baby. And then I asked my mom. And they both described exactly how it felt.

That's a little leg stretched out!
3 weeks ago when we had our second sonogram, we saw the baby moving around, little arms and legs flailing. Later that day I texted LoLo and said, "I think our baby was dancing Merengue!" And he agreed.

And as for whether or not we are going to find out the sex, we're thinking not. How many times in life do you get a genuine, exciting, happy surprise? And Lord knows I will need some type of incentive/reward for pushing that baby out.

Next Tuesday, we have another sonogram and I can't wait to see how much the baby has grown! It's finally starting to feel real. LoLo and I are having a baby!