But seriously. I need to talk about something. I figured out another reason why I'm not ready to have children.
I'm not ready to even imagine talking to my offspring about sex. In fact, I'm thinking that I'm going to let LoLo do it. And I come to that conclusion because the talk I received was somewhat laughable and not at all an example to follow.
Let me pause yet again to apologize to my father. Sorry P-Diddy, but I'm blowing up your spot.
When I was in 9th grade, my father decided it was time to give me "the talk". His initial strategy was a sound one. We were in the car so unless I decided to risk my life and jump out (I came close), I would be forced to listen. What he didn't plan out though was what he was going to say.
He started by asking me if I "knew the mechanics". (record scratch) I'm sorry....the WHAT?
As soon as he repeated it, I knew exactly where he was going. I took this opportunity to grab his brick of a cell phone (seriously...think Zack Morris's phone) and call my mom.
|Mom? Dad's trying to give me "the talk"!!! via|
So I have decided. There's no way I could have such a conversation.
Maybe by the time my children are old enough to have that conversation Siri will be able to do it for me.